The Voice: In Which We All Fight a Battle With Rory's Hair. And Lose.

I think the most intense battle from last week was fought by the front and the back of Rory Shields' hair. Except there were no winners here. We all lost royally.

Seriously, what is up with that rat's nest? Is that "rock" now? I'm pretty sure Dave Grohl would have something to say about that - and I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be good.

Here are the other things that annoyed me tonight:

1. Who in their right mind thought it was ok to have that child go by "Pip"? Inappropriate.

2. Oh, also that performance of "What's Love Got To Do With It?" was really bad. I know the hair was distracting, but in a way, it was good to have something stand as a symbol for JUST HOW BAD IT ALL WAS.

4. Thank god for fast forward. There's a lot of filler in here. Filler that I don't care about.

5. What's with all the one naming? Why is that ok?

6. The phrasing in "No Air" has always bothered me. And it's not made better with weird tattoos and a mohawk/pompadour. Or a screeching 17 year old. Jordin Sparks you're not. Also? "Jonathas" is not even a word.

7. If you have to say you're having fun, then you're not having fun. Right now? I'm not having fun.

8. Bold move telling Kelly that you'll go on tour with her only if you can open. I'm going to leave it at that.

9. Wait. Her name is ALyX? Ugh. I hate this show.

10. I'm tired of all these Adele sound-alikes. I like Adele. I do. But just like they made all those shows about single 20-somethings who sit around and talk about nothing in the two years that followed Friends, trying to trot out the next Adele isn't going to work our great for anyone in the long term. And Christina - you're not helping by comparing her to Adele right there in your critique. So that's for that.

11. Way to dress up for national tv, Levine. You look like you're at home with the flu.

12. Who's calling this show? Why do the lights always come up halfway through the first line of the song? It's called "GO" jerk. Push the damn button.

13. I'll be glad when these battle rounds are over, for the simple fact that I'd like to never again see that little sparkly 45 that Christina has been wearing on her head.

14. How long do we think they actually sit there waiting for the judge's decision? Is it really a snap judgment like it seems on tv? Or is the waiting and the talking and the "You guys are both amazing" stuff all killed in the editing bay.

15. Ugh. "Thank you for turning your chairs around"? That's what you're ending with? Boo.

Booooooooooo.