Oh Hootie Hoo - you were in top form this week. I was so close to falling asleep and you brought me back. I was literally cheering for half of the episode. Hootie Hoo!
OBSERVATION #1: Has it always been called the Stew Room? How did I miss that? And why did Pamda say it twice tonight?
Hootie Hoo!: I might as well keep the Hootie love going. The Oats Lady! Creative Monkeys! Meditating with flickering eye movements! Hands up! Bad-ow! God, it was all so beautiful, I managed to forgive you for starting some sort of Top Headband trend during Judges' Table. My favorite thing about tonight (aside from all the hoo-ing) was that I spent every Carla confessional trying to figure out who you reminded me of. And then it hit me - the Road Runner. Hootie Hoo!
OBSERVATION #2: How hot did Padma look in that referee's shirt?
Fabio: OK. You're from a foreign country. I get it. And yes, I cannot stand that 90% of the things you say are completely indecipherable (that's a real number - 9/10 of my notes about you say "What?!") which is often annoying. But the things that I DO understand are what makes me hate you. "Don't make fun of my food." Well, stop making stupid dishes with eggplant - no one likes eggplant. "I think my challenge is to cook something." No, you're going to get points for sparring with Spike. "I could put Monkey Ass on a plate." You said that last week. Do you know so little slang that you have to make it up and repeat it multiple times? You should have gone home this week - not just for your stupid food, but for being a major jerk to the guest judge. And apologizing at the end while stealing Keanu's thunder did not help things. Go away.
OBSERVATION #3: I didn't realize that I missed Nikki (the Human Pasta Machine?) until I saw her. And then after a while, I realize that I didn't miss her at all.
Canned Crab: All I could do was stare at your weird front teeth. Everyone has been talking about it, but tonight was the first night that I noticed it. Oh well - thank you for not dwelling on the whole kissing fiasco this week.
OBSERVATION #4: Someone should tell Toby that he's inside. Because those tinted glasses just make you look like a douche. Oh well - at least the bitchy retorts stayed at home tonight - maybe he forgot his notebook.
Rainbow Brite: Way to make...soup. Yeah, whatever, you didn't puree anything. But you still made soup. And your headband looked stupid. That's all.
OBSERVATION #5:
Keanu: Plates? That's all you could come up with? Plastic plates? I feel bad that you couldn't reign in your creative monkeys. Well, at least you gave everyone one last shirtless shot before you left. Even if it was negated by the sight of your bunkmate.
OBSERVATION #6: Spike's hats are still stupid - is it me or does he look like one of the Von Trapp kids tonight? And the big guy who allows people to call him Chunk? I think he looks like a Garbage Pail Kid.
T*ts McGoo: Blah. Blah. Blah. Blah. Whatever.
OBSERVATION #7: Is Debbie wearing pants? All I see is Jersey. I miss you, Debbie.
Melonhead: You deserved to be in the bottom three, even if it was "only your first time so you're definitely safe". I doubt it will have any impact on your ego, but at least I had one week of joy.
OBSERVATION #8: Remember Make Me a Supermodel? How they took normal pretty people and made them all high fashion and stuff? The new people look weird right from the start. And not in a good way. And they fired Niki. I'm totally not watching. Not when Idol is just about to get good.
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Thursday, January 29, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
In Which I Throw My Hands Up
(Top Chef: Episode 9 recap)
Seriously. I am done with all of you people. Stephanie, please come back - and stop appearing in those uncomfortable commericals with chefs that I have never heard of. I don't want to taste their desserts featuring Dr. Pepper, and neither do you.
I'm forgoing the usual format, because I'm just too annoyed.
REAL WORLD: It's nice that two seemingly professional chefs have decided to air their personal lives on tv, in front of the world AND THE PEOPLE THAT THEY'RE CHEATING ON. Correct me if I'm wrong, but when you're laying together on a one person couch and making out, you've crossed the line between "flirting" and "cheating." I'm glad you two were flustered. If Gail knew what was going on, she'd send you home in a heartbeat.
THOUGHT #1: Which reminds me how much I miss Gail. This Douche-y Young appears to speak in soundbites - like he has a list of pithy phrases that he wrote in his Top Chef Notebook on the plane from England and he just pulls one or two out at random each week.
HOOTIE HOO: Please stop messing up. Please? Please?! I'll be sad when you go, just because I no longer like anyone else.
THOUGHT #2: I didn't actually think that Debbie would win, but I thought she had a good chance of Antonia-ing it into the top four.
SWEDISH CHEF: Why was it so hard to just tell your team what you were making for dessert? I wish you weren't such a jerk. But you're clearly the best one in the kitchen. I suppose you should win, just because no one else is competent. And because you're destined to be a head chef somewhere - then everyone will listen to you because they have to, not because you're a poor team player.
THOUGHT #3: This was a pretty lame Restaurant War. Why does someone always insist on food with "Asian flair?"
EVERYONE ELSE: Boo. That's all. Boo.
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I'm forgoing the usual format, because I'm just too annoyed.
REAL WORLD: It's nice that two seemingly professional chefs have decided to air their personal lives on tv, in front of the world AND THE PEOPLE THAT THEY'RE CHEATING ON. Correct me if I'm wrong, but when you're laying together on a one person couch and making out, you've crossed the line between "flirting" and "cheating." I'm glad you two were flustered. If Gail knew what was going on, she'd send you home in a heartbeat.
THOUGHT #1: Which reminds me how much I miss Gail. This Douche-y Young appears to speak in soundbites - like he has a list of pithy phrases that he wrote in his Top Chef Notebook on the plane from England and he just pulls one or two out at random each week.
HOOTIE HOO: Please stop messing up. Please? Please?! I'll be sad when you go, just because I no longer like anyone else.
THOUGHT #2: I didn't actually think that Debbie would win, but I thought she had a good chance of Antonia-ing it into the top four.
SWEDISH CHEF: Why was it so hard to just tell your team what you were making for dessert? I wish you weren't such a jerk. But you're clearly the best one in the kitchen. I suppose you should win, just because no one else is competent. And because you're destined to be a head chef somewhere - then everyone will listen to you because they have to, not because you're a poor team player.
THOUGHT #3: This was a pretty lame Restaurant War. Why does someone always insist on food with "Asian flair?"
EVERYONE ELSE: Boo. That's all. Boo.
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Thursday, January 15, 2009
The More Things Change
(Top Chef: Episode 8 recap)
Yeah, I fell asleep again. But this time I woke up and watched the rest of the episode. So here we are.
OBSERVATION #1: Thank god we opened this episode showing what I'm sure is stock "Keanu getting dressed" footage. It's like we're back in episode one.
Debbie/Jersey/Deviled: Speaking of episode #1, She Who Cannot Be Nicknamed royally sucked again, even when attempting to prepare her signature dish: cooked meat. Personally, I feel bad for Debbie: I had really grown to like her Jersey ways. But this is one instance that TC is so much like Idol. If the people can't figure out who you are as a chef, you're going to get Gina Glocksen-ed right out of the competition. (She was even wearing a New York Native t-shirt, when we all know she's from Jersey. How can you expect us to know you, if you don't know yourself? God, I'm deep this morning.)
OBSERVATION #2: Special love to Padma for sticking up for Debbie with her petulant "She CAN cook" directed at one cranky Brit. "I thought we agreed to judge them on each individual competition." Shut up dumbass. If you're going to judge them fairly each week, don't make broad generalizations like "She can't cook." I miss you, Gayle.
Hootie Hoo!: Oh thank you, Hootie, for coming back. Thank you for your resounding Hoo Hoo!! when Team Chicken won the challenge. And thank you for making the exact same pastry (with special guest Thyme!) that you did weeks ago. (Intelligently done? From Hootie? I'm thinking it was just the way she harnessed all the negative energy - there's nothing intelligent about this bunch.) I'm feeling nostalgic for the beginning of the season already. Or maybe that's because back in the good old days of positive temperatures, I wasn't wearing two pairs of pants.
Fabio: I going to have to stop listening to you talk. The way you don't make anything plural really upsets me. You are not about to "Cook for the farmer." They're farmerS. Just throw an S at the end of the word and you're speaking proper English. Your only saving grace is that I do love how you've come to accept the fact that everyone calls Melonhead your boyfriend. Hilarious. It's like an episode of Boy Meets Boy Meets Lesbian up here.
OBSERVATION #3: Why is there so much hate for "The Heavy Hand of Pesto?"
Canned Crab: If you'd spend less time making googly eyes, maybe you would realize that it's still warm out while you're filming. Grilled lamb (just like DD suggested) would have been totally seasonal. And maybe you would have realized that pounding the lamb into submission was not the best plan. Ganging up on DD is not the way to make me root for you.
Rainbow Brite: Sigh. I can't believe you made soup. Again. Do you know how to do anything except soup and scallops? Any time you try something else we wind up with a mushy bruschetta (and stop saying it like you're from Italy. Just pronounce it brush-etta like everyone else.)
OBSERVATION #4: Was anyone else really hoping that they were going to have to kill and butcher their own animals? Maybe I was feeling a little bloodthirsty last night. Or maybe I wanted something to liven up this incredibly dull season. You know, something that doesn't involve people making out on a couch.
Keanu: I'm going to transcribe my notes word for word, for I can't even be bothered to give you full sentences: Shirt. Snob - pallet of trash? Fish Sauce. Ew. Friend Green Tomatoes. Good movie, better book. "Conk" or "Conch"? And that's all you get today.
T*ts McGoo: Boooooo. Boooooooo. I cannot believe you threw Debbie under the bus. You totally tied all those rolls and they looked like crap. You're still here because the producers came in during Judges' Table and told Padma that she had to keep you because you had a good (?) storyline. I bet Padma also negotiated a rasie in her contract for following those directions, because she does not like you. No one likes you except Canned Crab, and that's not saying much. Booooooo.
OBSERVATION #5: Why does Bravo allow someone to sit there and say the word "Cock" over and over? He's talking about a rooster in the same way that Hooters is talking about owls. Dirty.
India: I love that someone on Team Pork actually had the balls to say "We're not going to cook anything Indian." Which is probably why you didn't do anything. I can imagine you standing next to Fabio and Keanu with your bag of curry with pleading eyes like those labrador puppies someone supposedly rescued from the road (hoax, by the way - check snopes.com). "Now? Can I put the curry in now? Huh? Can I?"
Melonhead: I think it's the creepy way you hold your cigarette (and Bravo only shows you doing that because you're European - this allows housewives in Springfield to feel better about themselves because they quit smoking last year and you heathens are still at it) that makes me dislike you so. Or the way you still clearly have it bad for Rainbow, who makes it very obvious that SHE DOES NOT LIKE YOU. Actually, it's probably because you're bald. There's too much damn bald on this show. Thank god for Keanu and Fabio.
OBSERVATION #6: I'm sure the producers enjoyed Toby's "I would have full blown unprotected sex, maybe even go to first base with that pork." Are bases different in England, because I'm confused. Or maybe it's just foreshadowing to my next observation:
OBSERVATION #7: Before we get all "Real World: Third Time's a Charm in New York," let's pint out that CC was wearing an I Heart Padma t-shirt at the top of the show. Does Padma see that kind of thing, or is it always hidden underneath the chef's jacket in some sort of Feng Shui concealed intentions sort of way? More importantly, why does Bravo keep hinting at the eventual downfall of CC and T*ts' real-life relationships (like they haven't already done it - but next week they'll go to first base!)? Why does T*ts call CC her "buddy?" Was the first word of that nickname edited out? The cooking is clearly so poor this season that we're reduced to this.
If I wanted relationship drama (featuring the T-Mobile Sidekick!!) I'd be watching Tool Academy. And if it were Sunday, you can bet that's exactly what I'd be doing.
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OBSERVATION #1: Thank god we opened this episode showing what I'm sure is stock "Keanu getting dressed" footage. It's like we're back in episode one.
Debbie/Jersey/Deviled: Speaking of episode #1, She Who Cannot Be Nicknamed royally sucked again, even when attempting to prepare her signature dish: cooked meat. Personally, I feel bad for Debbie: I had really grown to like her Jersey ways. But this is one instance that TC is so much like Idol. If the people can't figure out who you are as a chef, you're going to get Gina Glocksen-ed right out of the competition. (She was even wearing a New York Native t-shirt, when we all know she's from Jersey. How can you expect us to know you, if you don't know yourself? God, I'm deep this morning.)
OBSERVATION #2: Special love to Padma for sticking up for Debbie with her petulant "She CAN cook" directed at one cranky Brit. "I thought we agreed to judge them on each individual competition." Shut up dumbass. If you're going to judge them fairly each week, don't make broad generalizations like "She can't cook." I miss you, Gayle.
Hootie Hoo!: Oh thank you, Hootie, for coming back. Thank you for your resounding Hoo Hoo!! when Team Chicken won the challenge. And thank you for making the exact same pastry (with special guest Thyme!) that you did weeks ago. (Intelligently done? From Hootie? I'm thinking it was just the way she harnessed all the negative energy - there's nothing intelligent about this bunch.) I'm feeling nostalgic for the beginning of the season already. Or maybe that's because back in the good old days of positive temperatures, I wasn't wearing two pairs of pants.
Fabio: I going to have to stop listening to you talk. The way you don't make anything plural really upsets me. You are not about to "Cook for the farmer." They're farmerS. Just throw an S at the end of the word and you're speaking proper English. Your only saving grace is that I do love how you've come to accept the fact that everyone calls Melonhead your boyfriend. Hilarious. It's like an episode of Boy Meets Boy Meets Lesbian up here.
OBSERVATION #3: Why is there so much hate for "The Heavy Hand of Pesto?"
Canned Crab: If you'd spend less time making googly eyes, maybe you would realize that it's still warm out while you're filming. Grilled lamb (just like DD suggested) would have been totally seasonal. And maybe you would have realized that pounding the lamb into submission was not the best plan. Ganging up on DD is not the way to make me root for you.
Rainbow Brite: Sigh. I can't believe you made soup. Again. Do you know how to do anything except soup and scallops? Any time you try something else we wind up with a mushy bruschetta (and stop saying it like you're from Italy. Just pronounce it brush-etta like everyone else.)
OBSERVATION #4: Was anyone else really hoping that they were going to have to kill and butcher their own animals? Maybe I was feeling a little bloodthirsty last night. Or maybe I wanted something to liven up this incredibly dull season. You know, something that doesn't involve people making out on a couch.
Keanu: I'm going to transcribe my notes word for word, for I can't even be bothered to give you full sentences: Shirt. Snob - pallet of trash? Fish Sauce. Ew. Friend Green Tomatoes. Good movie, better book. "Conk" or "Conch"? And that's all you get today.
T*ts McGoo: Boooooo. Boooooooo. I cannot believe you threw Debbie under the bus. You totally tied all those rolls and they looked like crap. You're still here because the producers came in during Judges' Table and told Padma that she had to keep you because you had a good (?) storyline. I bet Padma also negotiated a rasie in her contract for following those directions, because she does not like you. No one likes you except Canned Crab, and that's not saying much. Booooooo.
OBSERVATION #5: Why does Bravo allow someone to sit there and say the word "Cock" over and over? He's talking about a rooster in the same way that Hooters is talking about owls. Dirty.
India: I love that someone on Team Pork actually had the balls to say "We're not going to cook anything Indian." Which is probably why you didn't do anything. I can imagine you standing next to Fabio and Keanu with your bag of curry with pleading eyes like those labrador puppies someone supposedly rescued from the road (hoax, by the way - check snopes.com). "Now? Can I put the curry in now? Huh? Can I?"
Melonhead: I think it's the creepy way you hold your cigarette (and Bravo only shows you doing that because you're European - this allows housewives in Springfield to feel better about themselves because they quit smoking last year and you heathens are still at it) that makes me dislike you so. Or the way you still clearly have it bad for Rainbow, who makes it very obvious that SHE DOES NOT LIKE YOU. Actually, it's probably because you're bald. There's too much damn bald on this show. Thank god for Keanu and Fabio.
OBSERVATION #6: I'm sure the producers enjoyed Toby's "I would have full blown unprotected sex, maybe even go to first base with that pork." Are bases different in England, because I'm confused. Or maybe it's just foreshadowing to my next observation:
OBSERVATION #7: Before we get all "Real World: Third Time's a Charm in New York," let's pint out that CC was wearing an I Heart Padma t-shirt at the top of the show. Does Padma see that kind of thing, or is it always hidden underneath the chef's jacket in some sort of Feng Shui concealed intentions sort of way? More importantly, why does Bravo keep hinting at the eventual downfall of CC and T*ts' real-life relationships (like they haven't already done it - but next week they'll go to first base!)? Why does T*ts call CC her "buddy?" Was the first word of that nickname edited out? The cooking is clearly so poor this season that we're reduced to this.
If I wanted relationship drama (featuring the T-Mobile Sidekick!!) I'd be watching Tool Academy. And if it were Sunday, you can bet that's exactly what I'd be doing.
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The Bland Leading the Bland
(Top Chef: Episode 7 recap)
Those of you in the theatre know what it means to be in tech week. For this week's episode, it meant that I spent three days starting to watch this episode at 11:30pm and then falling asleep midway through the Quickfire judging. And on those days I wasn't at rehearsal, I was busy getting drunk. (To be fair, I was also drunk on some of the days I did have rehearsal. Ah, theatre.)
But I digress. Just like Bravo's crazy rerun schedule, this recap will appear right before the next recap. And if I really wanted to Bravo it up, maybe I'll post the next note sixteen times over the next week. Or maybe not.
OBSERVATION #1: Why do chefs have so much attitude about desserts? It can't be that hard to make a soup, no matter what Rainbow Brite tells you. But to make a chocolate cake that makes me cry? That's an impressive feat. Suck it up team, and realize that people like dessert. We do not like, however, things with Swiss chard. Or dikon.
Jersey Girl: Damn if you didn't make me thirsty for Dr. Pepper in your QF. But what's a skatewing? Fish don't have wings. Don't start making up food to impress the judges. And if you would stick to one theme, it would make it a lot easier for me to give you a nickname that sticks. Thanks in advance.
Hootie Hoo!: You had me scared, Hootie. I need you and your jazz hands to stick around until at least the top four. I enjoy a nice gremolata as much as the next guy, but pea risotto? No one likes peas. Peas are what you leave on the plate and hide under the rest of your mashed potatoes when you're six and your mom wants you to clean your plate or no dessert for you. I'm 31. Don't make me relive those times. I can have dessert whenever I want now.
OBSERVATION #2: If I were a pastry chef, I would be very happy. And fat. Jean Christophe is neither of these things, which concerns me. Come on man, how about one smile?
Fabio: Don't blame your Quickfire loss on being Italian. Blame it on you being obnoxious.
Samebird: I can't believe you're STILL sticking by last week's dish. No one liked it. Let it go. I also wrote something like "Top Pog? Oh?" in my notes, but I no longer know what that means. Well, you're gone, so it doesn't matter much now anyway, does it?
OBSERVATION #3: I miss Stephanie. It's good to see her - but why is that dude wearing a big yellow hat? Does he think that Steph is Curious George? Does he think he's that one dude from last season who always wore questionable headgear? I don't know what to think of you...and I'm pretty sure Stephanie is not convinced about you either.
Canned Crab: Wow, I wrote down nothing about you. Where are the wistful looks and the sidelong glances? Stop boring me. Give me some drama.
Rainbow Brite: Top Scallop. I love that we were able to use the same quotes from Fabio from last week's episode. BECAUSE HE'S RIGHT! STOP COOKING SCALLOPS! Sorry. I got excited. I do not care that RB finally won. And if I see her go to the cooler and pull out a bag of scallops one more time, I will do something.
OBSERVATION #4: I like that Padma is rocking the scar again. When it finally stops snowing, I'm going to start wearing sleeveless shirts all the time to show mine off, too. And with the condition that it has to stop snowing, I probably won't need to hit up the Hollister store any time soon.
Keanu: You really like sorbet, don't you? I'm skeptical about this whole avocado thing, but I'll go with it because I like ice cream.
T*ts McGoo: All I have for you is a thank you for making strawberries with balsamic. I love balsamic. Put that stuff with some vanilla ice cream, and we're set.
OBSERVATION #5: I was right. Toby Young is a douche. I think he says mean things just to be funny and get attention. And then, as I type that, I look in the mirror. Hm. My hair looks nice today.
Bangs: I was all set to call this Top Scarf or Top Sunglasses, but then you went and made fish tacos. Fish Tacos. (Which are so boring, they're probably a good metaphor for your personality, but I've ruined it by spelling that out. Oh well.) They sell those at Chilis. And while I like Chilis, I do not think their food belongs on Top Chef. So it's probably good that you're gone. Go and have a Presidente and some chips and tacos, and you'll feel better.
India: The problem is that I keep confusing you with the Indian chick from Next Food Network Star. And she was lame. So I kind of think you're lame too. Step it up and stop cooking Indian things.
OBSERVATION #6: Did anyone wonder if Padma and JC were really going to lift all that sugar? I was kind of sad to see them roll it away on a cart. Sigh.
Melonhead: Man, you're not fooling anyone, least of all Jean Christophe. We know you're not French. We know you're not from California. You're starting to sound like James Taylor - always whining about where you're going and where you've been and never satisfied with where you are (and if any of you are JT fans, I don't want to hear it - that dude is lame).
OBSERVATION #7: Technically, I need to be writing another recap right now. So instead of proofreading this one, I'm going to go with Bravo's editing technique and just post it now. How's that for bold?
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But I digress. Just like Bravo's crazy rerun schedule, this recap will appear right before the next recap. And if I really wanted to Bravo it up, maybe I'll post the next note sixteen times over the next week. Or maybe not.
OBSERVATION #1: Why do chefs have so much attitude about desserts? It can't be that hard to make a soup, no matter what Rainbow Brite tells you. But to make a chocolate cake that makes me cry? That's an impressive feat. Suck it up team, and realize that people like dessert. We do not like, however, things with Swiss chard. Or dikon.
Jersey Girl: Damn if you didn't make me thirsty for Dr. Pepper in your QF. But what's a skatewing? Fish don't have wings. Don't start making up food to impress the judges. And if you would stick to one theme, it would make it a lot easier for me to give you a nickname that sticks. Thanks in advance.
Hootie Hoo!: You had me scared, Hootie. I need you and your jazz hands to stick around until at least the top four. I enjoy a nice gremolata as much as the next guy, but pea risotto? No one likes peas. Peas are what you leave on the plate and hide under the rest of your mashed potatoes when you're six and your mom wants you to clean your plate or no dessert for you. I'm 31. Don't make me relive those times. I can have dessert whenever I want now.
OBSERVATION #2: If I were a pastry chef, I would be very happy. And fat. Jean Christophe is neither of these things, which concerns me. Come on man, how about one smile?
Fabio: Don't blame your Quickfire loss on being Italian. Blame it on you being obnoxious.
Samebird: I can't believe you're STILL sticking by last week's dish. No one liked it. Let it go. I also wrote something like "Top Pog? Oh?" in my notes, but I no longer know what that means. Well, you're gone, so it doesn't matter much now anyway, does it?
OBSERVATION #3: I miss Stephanie. It's good to see her - but why is that dude wearing a big yellow hat? Does he think that Steph is Curious George? Does he think he's that one dude from last season who always wore questionable headgear? I don't know what to think of you...and I'm pretty sure Stephanie is not convinced about you either.
Canned Crab: Wow, I wrote down nothing about you. Where are the wistful looks and the sidelong glances? Stop boring me. Give me some drama.
Rainbow Brite: Top Scallop. I love that we were able to use the same quotes from Fabio from last week's episode. BECAUSE HE'S RIGHT! STOP COOKING SCALLOPS! Sorry. I got excited. I do not care that RB finally won. And if I see her go to the cooler and pull out a bag of scallops one more time, I will do something.
OBSERVATION #4: I like that Padma is rocking the scar again. When it finally stops snowing, I'm going to start wearing sleeveless shirts all the time to show mine off, too. And with the condition that it has to stop snowing, I probably won't need to hit up the Hollister store any time soon.
Keanu: You really like sorbet, don't you? I'm skeptical about this whole avocado thing, but I'll go with it because I like ice cream.
T*ts McGoo: All I have for you is a thank you for making strawberries with balsamic. I love balsamic. Put that stuff with some vanilla ice cream, and we're set.
OBSERVATION #5: I was right. Toby Young is a douche. I think he says mean things just to be funny and get attention. And then, as I type that, I look in the mirror. Hm. My hair looks nice today.
Bangs: I was all set to call this Top Scarf or Top Sunglasses, but then you went and made fish tacos. Fish Tacos. (Which are so boring, they're probably a good metaphor for your personality, but I've ruined it by spelling that out. Oh well.) They sell those at Chilis. And while I like Chilis, I do not think their food belongs on Top Chef. So it's probably good that you're gone. Go and have a Presidente and some chips and tacos, and you'll feel better.
India: The problem is that I keep confusing you with the Indian chick from Next Food Network Star. And she was lame. So I kind of think you're lame too. Step it up and stop cooking Indian things.
OBSERVATION #6: Did anyone wonder if Padma and JC were really going to lift all that sugar? I was kind of sad to see them roll it away on a cart. Sigh.
Melonhead: Man, you're not fooling anyone, least of all Jean Christophe. We know you're not French. We know you're not from California. You're starting to sound like James Taylor - always whining about where you're going and where you've been and never satisfied with where you are (and if any of you are JT fans, I don't want to hear it - that dude is lame).
OBSERVATION #7: Technically, I need to be writing another recap right now. So instead of proofreading this one, I'm going to go with Bravo's editing technique and just post it now. How's that for bold?
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